★ Joce ع١٥٧ Jun ; 陈怡文 ♥ 沈永俊 ★

2009-10-04T13:27:00.001+08:00

i've moved. :) msn me for my new link.

2009-08-31T11:38:00.001+08:00

seriously, my parents are fucking bias.

2009-08-29T10:16:00.000+08:00

im very contented with the life im leading right now.
my bf, the true friends made my life just right.

and, the holidays have just begun...

2009-08-13T15:39:00.000+08:00

after sooo long. im back :D
well, i believe no one comes here anymore, but well, its a place where i can pour things out.
everything's smooth between me and bf :D
attachment ended! :D
back to school days are here :/

went back to school just now. felt so raw. so weird. after leaving school for sucha long time, finally time to go back to school. well, i dont think i'll have problem reaching by 8.30am. haha. will most probably drive to school everyday!
well, life's been great.

brother's bday celebration this saturday at uncle's place.
preparation tomorrow with mummy! :D

miss my popeye boy

2009-07-24T01:35:00.001+08:00

currently using my E71 to blog.
Tossing and turning on my bed, cant get to sleep. Therefore, decided to use my phone to surf the net.

Im missing naughty boy so much. He hasnt contacted me for the whole of today. Hopefully i can meet him tmr!

I realised the importance of him in my life. Without him life has been so different

2009-07-13T21:44:00.001+08:00

jealous of what others have and i dont.
is that asking for too much?
surprises.
i havent had one in 1year, 11months and counting.
sigh.

2009-07-09T00:20:00.002+08:00

I believe if i asked baby this question," What if one day, I leave you?"
Being the straightforward person he is, he will answer," I will still carry on my life the way it was without you. Of course I will miss you and and all that, but I'll not show."

This made me think for awhile, I m the one who was always depending on him, every errands that I ran, he had to accompany me.

While he could do everything by himself, he is just like the opposite of me in one way or another.

Of course, life will never goes back the way it was before him for me.
I had long forgotten how life looks like to me before him.
Yeah, my best friends are still my best friends, bet they had already forgotten the real 'ME' before baby's arrival.

You must be like thinking, * its not like you guys are breaking up*
Some many long lasting couples broke up around me and some trying hard to get together.
So i will think alot right!

Life's so fragile.
Really, its time for me to appreciate life and what i've got now.

2009-06-09T19:27:00.002+08:00

We all hope and pray that the meeting Tony and those fuckers are having tomorrow runs smoothly. Its like a case that two of them have to fight over which is meant for us. We really hope we didnt or wont get tony into trouble. As for that cat family with 3 kittens. Im sure they will get their retribution someday. We all believe in retribution!

I believe in praying to a god when you really need some luck or rather some safety whether in terms of test, exams or safety when you or your love one has to go overseas or a new environment. And i also learnt a lesson, that when you really having something important coming up soon, dont laugh and say people. Well, that doesnt mean that you can laugh and say people when there's nothing going on. But, to a certain extent and only when that person u are saying really did something wrong. I dont know how many people believe in this? :)

Baby's sailing on Friday to Sunday and Monday to Tuesday :(
So consecutively hor?

I want to drive b out for a round.
I want to change my phone.
I want to get out of this tiring life with this kinda fucked up boss.
I want to get my CARD LICENSE!
I want the whole series of Shopaholic
I want either a CheChe watch, Vagary Watch or a Baby G watch. Sponsers?
I want the Louis Vuitton Koala wallet.
I NEED a new virus protection for my computer!
I NEED to be on diet!

:( i need money!

2009-06-08T22:47:00.002+08:00

*blows dust*

i feel i only come to this blog to write out whatever im unhappy about it seems that i dont come here whenever im happy and people who reads my blog will think i have been leading a miserable life.

many things had or have happened. from attachment to boyfriend to family to friends. Some happy, some sad, some angry. where should i start from?

alright. attachment. the boss suck big time. Cat is their family's name. There's a male cat, a female cat and 3 kittens - 2males 1 female. Not that im being nasty or bad. They are really too much. im too lazy to update here. my close ones should know what the hell they are up to.

ok family. i havent been spending much time with them. and i dont want to spend TOO much time with them else, i will have to be the driver. not that i want to show off that i have a license but, driving with my family members are way too stressful. too many drivers in the car. CMI -.-

next, friends. Amelia, xaby, wei jian. We have all gone through alot and alot through out this. i can feel that our relationship has been stronger. whether, its happiness or unhappiness with one another. laughing or throwing temper and all. others that i didnt mention, everyone of us are way to busy to contact one another. and we shall meet up soon :)

lastly, not forgetting him. being through so much and so much. months and months of anniversary had passed. being through so much and yet still the one for me. thanks :) although sometimes there are unhappiness and all but im swallowing it all down and let this relationship run smooth.

all in all, my life had been filled with all kinds of emotion :)

till then

2009-05-20T21:49:00.002+08:00

im sick of repeating what i expect and want.
im sick of waiting for you to prepare and meet me.

不同人有不同的时间观念
ur awhile = minimum 1 hour
ur going home le = minimum 1 hour
ur soon = minimum 1 hour.

ridiculous aint it?

i cant be bothered with such stuffs. i needa buck up on my driving. almost kissed a kerb today.

jocelyn, 5 more days to go.
you've only got 1 time to put in all your best effort and make no regrets no matter what the result is. no one can be there for you, except urself.

2009-05-18T21:51:00.003+08:00

im very envious of people's sweet relationship.
cause mine aint sweet anymore.
honeymoon period's over.
he says he loves me.
but i dont feel so.
am i right or wrong to feel this way?
who can i turn to?
我好累
好想跑到一个没人找得到我的地方
我不敢发脾气在你身上,不想吵架
考车的日期要到了. 压力好大,好想及格

2009-05-18T21:35:00.002+08:00

what wj say is true.
i can only trust myself and only myself.
not even my family whom are selfish.
my friends are still alright but they cant always be there for me.
my bf? guess we cant really communicate anymore.
i wanted to rant about my driving today.
first lesson after 2 weeks. yet, no one is free to listen to me.
family couldnt be bothered.
bf cut me off.
friends, busy.
so who now?

its just
me, myself and I

2009-05-14T19:36:00.002+08:00

currently watching the wedding of michelle and shaun on mobtv.
i want a wedding as grand as theirs!
maybe i really know how amelia thinks after watching the show.
being able to walk so far aint easy.

will you be able to give me a wedding lidat?
i doubt

2009-04-30T22:09:00.003+08:00

did all the old times between us changed or?
when i looked into your eye, i dont feel the love at all. why?
i felt so lost. i really dont know how to rant out how i feel.
aint i supposed to be happy?
i just did my nails and today's our anniversary, im supposed to be happy.
i dont feel secured at all.
why.

2009-04-30T10:05:00.001+08:00

today's the 21st month that we are being together.
im suppose to be happy shouldnt i?
but im not happy at all. i cant smile at all.
my tears just keep rolling and rolling.
making my headache worse.
someone kill me.
i dont feel like carrying on this life.

school / attachment

2009-04-20T20:35:00.002+08:00

went back to school today for briefing.
as usual, all the DOs and DONTs.
we were posted to a company Advent2 @ lavendar.

time really flew. im in the last year of my poly life.
and after this, its the work - till - death life.

should i be happy or not?

2009-04-17T23:06:00.001+08:00

im not understanding.
i suck at being a gf.

please forgive me

2009-04-15T23:31:00.002+08:00

alright. haven been sleeping early since monday night.
not that i have insomnia or worries but, was addicted to the show EU :x
its been a long time since i got so addicted to a serial drama.
and so, i've asked my brother to rent the 2nd part for me tmr!
and i think i need to apologise to the usual 3. because, i slept super early in the morning, therefore, when they bombed my phone i didnt answer. :x sorry peeps.
life's been alright. school's starting on monday. i dont dread school well, actually im kinda looking forward to it.
briefing this friday. and i read wj's tp email and they say that attachment will start on 21st april. T.T gosh.
alright im off to bed. cause i've got driving tmr!

loved

2009-04-12T23:42:00.002+08:00

i've read a blog, where she and her guy knew each other through maple too.
well, i can say its b's friend de gf.
i could say, i see lotsa difference our relationship and theirs.

both started from a virtual game known as maplestory.
however, both leads a very different kinda lovestory or rather lifestyle.
its time i should treasure b.
i believe, i've been taking things for granted.
b's treating me too well, giving me everything i want and need.
sometimes, im the selfish one.
but, the way i put it or blog it makes people thinks that its b's fault.
coming to think of it, its just me being so selfish.
after reading the little girl's blog. i asked myself a few questions :
does b go missing for a few days?
does b ignores me?
do i need to contact b den he will contact me?
and a few more.
i feel, im really the lucky girl to have b.
though our relationship is getting older and older day by day and i cannot deny that there is no tiffs, arguments and quarels. we're still holding on to it. still standing strong as one.
still loving each other as much as before.
that's more than enough.
wrestling, fighting, kicking, puching to kissing, hugging, holding hands.
im actually a very lucky girl. yes i am.

b, i love you :)

2009-04-10T23:29:00.002+08:00

maybe i dont mean that much.
really, from the way you reply and all. i can see.
well....... im sure u are surely gonna say. "See, start again.."
nvm.

we arent meant for each other at all.
look at your lifestyle and mine.
totally different.
maybe i should put down everything and start anew.
but, on the other hand, i know im not that strong to do it at all.
but, i dont wanna carry on quarelling. wtf.
i dont know why. i just feel sensitive when u are with ur friends.
sorry. i know im selfish.
in everything there's always a choice to make. either this or that.
so which have you chosen?
you cant have 2 at a time. its always like that in reality.

im tired. i needa break.

2009-04-07T22:17:00.003+08:00

from now till forever, you are my habit, needs, future and necessity in life.
i cannot afford to lose you.
from maple characters to online friends to phone-ing friends to meeting out friends to lovers.
i appreciate everything of you.

:)

jun's still or rather will always be my drug.
something that i cannot live without.

driving tomorrowwww~
please please please please please let me pass my TP on the 1st try. :(

2009-04-07T14:38:00.001+08:00

i dont mean anything at all to anyone
anyone includes.
cousins
friends
family.

2009-04-06T23:36:00.001+08:00

seriously, im not being bad or evil.
but seriously. u're damn disgusting can.
you would always call me when he werent there.
and i've learnt my lesson that i wont pick up your phone anymore.
good luck ah!
he's going to taiwan already. good luck.

2009-04-01T13:11:00.000+08:00

When the nights are getting cold and blue
When the days are getting hard for you
I will always stay by your side
I promise you I’ll never hide

2009-03-31T21:36:00.002+08:00

yesterday was our 20th monthsary.
fast right?
baby's in army for 6 months already.
another 1year and 6 months ORD le!
time will fly de.

didnt meet up with friends yet or rather havent.
Friday friday! meeting up with choo and amelia :)

tmr's april fool's and well, i guess we have or rather i have already grown out of this.

till then.

2009-03-26T11:26:00.002+08:00

life's been great.
hanging out with the usual people, having lotsa fun and laughter together.
however, all of them are working already. so left with me being stucked at home.
actually, i just realise that acutally my cousins played a part in my life too.
sometimes,when me and my friends were meeting out. i would think of asking jorden and erica along. BUT, i realise they are not in singapore zz.
well, of course not forgeting jolene who's in shanghai and will be coming back soon.
hopefully we'll hang out together when you're back in singapore!
not forgeting my bf. who is only going to book on this saturday because of his guard duty on friday.
and baby has decided to take up driving already!

2009-03-20T21:53:00.001+08:00

i think time really flies.
its gonna be our 20month anniversary.
but we seem to be drifting apart?

2009-03-16T23:26:00.000+08:00

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

2009-03-16T23:16:00.003+08:00

went to malaysia today.
went there for a super nice meal!
xian dan crabbby!
went to emma's place after we were back in singapore.
bee had duty at 5.30 to 8.30pm.
nby's gonna have TP tomorrow and im meeting him tomorrow after his TP!

tues - meet ah boon
wed - home
thurs - driving / wj back from tw
fri - baby's book out
sat - work
sun - SHOPPING!

2009-03-15T00:12:00.004+08:00

aint appreciated.

who will i run to, who will i turn to when i really need someone to be here?
i guess its only myself.
im kinda angry with myself for being angry over bf going out.
but no choice ma. he always go out until so late.
12 am 1 am or what? 3 am?
i know he v guai le. but hais.
maybe, im really not someone who can lead a really good life like what my aunties are living in. DARLING. do this, DARLING take that.
mine? we play scissors paper stone la.
see who lose who do.
maybe im not someone who is borned to live in a luxurious life ba.

but i still love you.

to someone ,
firstly, i dont know how you got to my blog and secondly, i dont know if u're the person who i tot i think u are. but most probably ba. the one i saw at tanah merah bus stop today. whatever that has been between us has already ended years ago. regrets are too late already. you should have appreciated me at first. and, its too late to regret now. well, i believe if everything hadnt ended we would have still been together but too bad, we chose to end it. and im happy with my current relationship and he takes very good care of me. so dont worry about me being in his hands. he's treating me very well. although i might not be happy sometimes but still, i believe he's the one for me. we can always still be friends (: i hope you wont have mood swings anymore, when u see me sometimes u smile, when u see me sometimes u give me a fierce look. thanks for the beautiful childhood memories u gave me and left me with. i really appreciate you. thanks a zillion renjian .

2009-03-13T22:00:00.002+08:00

Just came back from Disney On Ice - Princess Wishes.
its not the childish joce that want to watch it.
its meimei who wants to watch it and poor her, her mum isnt into this kinda stuffs so i have to bring her there :).
the smile from her face and her giggling and laughing makes me feel contented.
she just makes me feel like doting on her and buying things for her.
enjoyed. didnt take any photos. forgot to bring my camera along -.-
it gives me the feeling of being in my younger days where my parents would bring my brother and i to watch this kinda disney on ice shows.
on the other hand, it gives me a feeling of being a responsible hmmmm, should i say parent? where i would have to take care of meimei make sure she's happy and contented? hahas.
i dont know :)

all in all, i enjoyed myself :)

baby's home already. booked out :)

2009-03-12T21:14:00.002+08:00

went shopping with brother.
spent about $50
food and popular book store.

i've noticed that im really spending too much money.
really. i need to cut down on spending.
i really do. if not baby pay not enough to feed me los!

2009-03-12T14:44:00.004+08:00

had a tiff with baby this morning.
spoilt my whole morning.
am glad that everything's fine now.

yesterday was great with the usual group of people.
ah choo is in taiwan already.
ah boon is having his TP next tues.
ah sim has gotten a job.
me? stucked at home -.-
really enjoyed yesterday although ah boon seemed v tired after his chalet.

results were out ytd.
at first we all thought its only out on sms yet me and ah choo didn apply for the sms thingy.
and we caught marley and me and during the show, people called to say online results were out. -.-
and ya, SURPRISINGLY, i passed ALL my subjects! im really very very happy.
rewards from bee this sunday!
well, marley and me. though the movie isnt as good as the book BUT, i teared again -.-
even after reading the book i still teared.
while reading the book i also teared.
its just so heart wrenching.
i dont know why the 2 guys didn teared but, miss sim caught me tearing and she took a pack of tissues for herself and me -.-
and i believe 98% of the theatre people teared ok.

a very nice and worth it show to watch!
a show off my movie list!

2009-03-10T19:42:00.003+08:00

many days has passed since saturday.
i've still been feeling the same every night.
was on my way home from driving, and things ran through my mind.
im kinda lonely in this world.
w/o bee, there's like no one else?
probably, the same people, ah choo, ah sim, ah boon.
well, i can say its enough?
true friends yeah?

something happen to ah choo last night.
i know and i always read your blog everyday.
i know feel very sad and shag.
its alright.
we'll play our hearts out tomorrow okay?
we'll make sure we all enjoy ourselves ya?
we've yet to have our reunion dinner leh!
and i've always been looking out for an outing for the 4 of us

loved

trust? love?

2009-03-07T23:46:00.003+08:00

you ask me to trust you.
sometimes i doubt myself.
i dont know if i really do trust you as much as i trust him.
maybe the scars he left me is still here.
ya, scars, shouldn't it be there forever unless you laser it off or apply somethings to it?
i've seen and heard many relationships, 5 years, 6years all going down the drain.
so what's ours gonna be?
the world is revolving, the world changes, things changes, people changes.
will you change? im sure you will.
its either for the better or for the worst.
i know you have already changed to a better guy for me.
yep, im not complaining that you are no good for me, just that, i still doubt us.
will you leave me like how he did?
i wont know, you wont know, no one knows.

was talking to mummy, she told me.
"girl, not mummy dont wanna treat yongjun as well as i treated renjian, mummy is very afraid u will be hurt like last time you know? mummy just want to make sure he's the right guy for you before mummy will teng him like how i teng renjian."

"your future is what you decide, mummy cant decide it for you. if you've chosen him, mummy cant object but what i can do is to make sure he's the right one here for you. so that mummy can hand you over to him without any worrys."

im very touch. really touched that my mum actually cares so much about me.
thanks mummy.

i will be strong to whatever it happens to this relationship.
i wouldnt be as stupid as before to commit suicide.
im always standing so strong infront of my friends, so why not stand strong in this relationship?

im proud of myself.
very. (:

from the very reliable jocelyn, to the independent girl.
trying to pick up doing things on her own.
shopping, getting stuffs, going home, run errands and all.
i noticed i've grown up. i really do.

and this is the 1st time im saying,
i love myself !

2009-03-03T22:02:00.001+08:00

快乐的时光总是过得很快.

agree?

2009-03-02T22:15:00.001+08:00

life's been great!
super duper uber great!

sleeping, eating, shopping, most importantly....... baby's accompany!
great.

sakae buffet with darling.
shopping for emma's prezzies!

2009-02-26T22:58:00.002+08:00

baby,
you know how lonely i feel every night?
i know i always look so happy.
but baby you know every night before i sleep, i feel so lonely.
i really need you by my side.
im missing u so much.
really. im not as strong as what you and my friends think i am.
i alwasy need someone there for me.
you always sleep so early, i know i dont blame you.
but you know why i always nvr sleep early?
cause, i wanna make myself, super tired. super duper uber tired.
so i can sleep peacefully.
i always wake up at 5am w/o fail. just that its half awake lidat. i always read your sms. but just that i didn reply.
baby, i really need you.

2009-02-24T00:36:00.000+08:00

Personality test.
True?

You're a really loving, and caring person towards your BF/GF. You really do care for them, and you love them unconditionally. Anyone would be lucky to have you. Because you'll always treat them with love, and care. ;D

2009-02-24T00:14:00.002+08:00

im not as strong as what my friends think i am.
i can speak loudly and say, fail fail nvm, supp is alright.
but actually deep down, who would really want to take supp papers right?
i need to keep a positive and cheerful attitude because that is me.
like what bee and i concluded yesterday,
im someone who is cheerful, happy-go-lucky, straight forward, block-headed......
i really want to remain happy and cheerful.
therefore, i always keep my feelings to myself and maybe only flare it out bee.
why wouldnt i throw temper on my friends?
maybe i do but only once in a blue moon.
i think friends are meant to be there for you and to share ur burdens and make u smile and NOT to let u flare on.
well, i dont know. i am not good in expressing my feelings in words.

i need bee.
i need a shoulder to cry on.

2009-02-23T19:17:00.001+08:00

all papers down!

but marketing sucks! crap.

baby's having block leave soooooooonnnnn!

2009-02-20T23:18:00.002+08:00

~~Financial Management and Forecasting~~
Marketing Concepts and Strategies
Quantitative Method

1 down 2 to go.

ineedahug

Wedding

2009-02-18T11:41:00.002+08:00

can 10k really be enough for a wedding in the year 2009 and more?
ha, i must be kidding right?
last time police wear shorts leh!
alright, worse comes to worst, i'll hold a wedding in the kopitiam . zz like what stupid artz said.
and i wont forget his $50.20 nonono, he increased to $60.20 on his blog. so bad right? friends for 7 years and counting still lidat. shagg. even NBY also says he will give $100. artz choo , you better reflect lors. rmb, 1 sin = 10 good deeds leh! hahas.

Actually,
i really thank God i found jun,
and blessed to have him as my bf.
He may be silly,
but at times, i learnt alot from him.
Not exactly him teaching me,
but the way he react to each quarrels and situation.
I learn to give & take,
to control my emotions according to the situation,
and stop comparing with others.
All these may be simple things,
but if you can really really do that.
Im sure the relationship will last.

(:

alrights. STUDYYYYYYY

Valentine's Day

2009-02-16T21:40:00.005+08:00

Happy BELATED Valentine's! i hope i aint too late!

14th February 2009

went to baby's place around 11am to set of to the zoo! i know we're abit lame to go to the zoo rights. but afterall, we enjoyed it and were both super sticky in the end -.- when i reached baby's place, the 1st thing he told me was, you want to see the flowers anot -.- alright. i know no surprises because, before valentine's i noticed that his money in his bank reduced ALOT and im worried to where his money flew to. and my dumbest bf doesnt knows how to lie and so, he told me he spent it on flowers for valentine's zz. alright. no photos uploaded because blogger is giving me a problem uploading them.

2009-02-11T19:31:00.000+08:00

finally, projects over!

and i've got something to declare. the used to me my father has been changed to be known as fucker (:

and another thing! VALENTINE'S DAY! omgosh.

2009-02-09T21:05:00.001+08:00

I see all that you have done for me.
I really appreciate it. Love you darling boy.

2009-02-08T00:37:00.000+08:00

baby, im so sorry.
i've made u tell me all the surprises for valentine's

lovee.

2009-02-06T21:26:00.002+08:00

im currently waiting for baby to finish bathing.

well, so many things have been happening in school.
projects, unhappiness, fun.......
weijian and i have chosen to give in. but, i really dont uds what cant she prioritise her time properly. pissed off.

i've decided to unprivate my blog and let bee come in and read already.
well, things have really been going very smoothly for us. i hope, this will continue. on and on.

Valentine's coming. i cant wait to go to the zoooo! hopefully, nothing crops up >.< like last year. CRAP.

meeting baby tomorrow and project on sunday with friends and bee! (:

that stupid boy hasnt finish bathing ! zzz

2009-02-04T20:51:00.000+08:00

baby, i've seen that you've improved and has put in effort into this relationship.
Thank you darling.
you make me feel very very secured.

2009-02-03T22:52:00.001+08:00

FAP.

omg. zzz. okay i'll not brood over it. forget it. imma nice girl.

baby's got duty this sunday! SHIT his bloody camp. zz. but at least he never tio duty on valentine's la. sooooo, yah. saves money cause he doesnt have to spend money to get someone to do his duty.

everyone's fake.

2009-02-03T10:02:00.003+08:00

im back. yes, like finally.

i have been so busy with school, family, friends and of course BF!

last week was the CNY week. was busied the whole week. relative's place, friend's place........
the only thing i looked forward is collecting ang paos! hahas. it has really been recession. the amount of money i have collected has dropped by $200. zzzz.

i have lotsa projects and presentation coming up!
i wanna clear them so i can have more time for bee.
CLEAR CLEAR CLEAR~

FTT's coming again -.- i hope i can pass! den i can apply for my driving test date already!

2009-01-22T23:40:00.001+08:00

i find im being so useless. really
i cant even do a simple project.
weijian im so sorry. :(

2009-01-22T22:53:00.000+08:00

PROJECT PROJECT PROJECT! GRRRRRR

BEE's booking out tomorrow! yes!

2009-01-21T19:03:00.001+08:00

Chinese new year is coming!

NAILS - done
HAIR - done
CLOTHES - almost there
SHOES - done
MAKE UP - done
BED SHEET - done
UNDERGARMENTS - done

hahas. seems like im all prepared for CNY!

2009-01-19T21:50:00.001+08:00

i hate my family.
i really do.
especially my father.
seriously, i hope he will die soon. VERY SOON please.

i love my bee, very much.
thank you darling

2009-01-17T00:29:00.002+08:00

i know you dont like me smsing you when u're with ur friends.
yes, its time jocelyn. time to learn how to give him freedom. time to let him go.
look, will you wait for me to be home when u're not with ur friends? NO. a definite and confirmed NO.
maybe, probably, most probably, we belong to people in different worlds.
look at the different lifestyles we are leading.
i'd to always bear scolding everytime i meet you. but do you appreciate?
really. coming to think of all these, makes me wanna give up.
maybe its time to.
well, do u still even read my blog? no bah. im so gonna private it and wait until u ask me why cant u read. den i will know truly from ur heart whether u take a little time to read my blog (:

i really need to thank you for everything. i believe its time i should slowly let you go.
JY joce.

2009-01-16T07:53:00.001+08:00

what's love?

2009-01-14T20:40:00.002+08:00

tomorrow night MAYBE baby will go back into camp. i think that stupid navy ship has got no god damn reception because, darling hasnt sms me since yesterday night! crap.

yes yes, people say i STICK to my bf, but i feel personally that im kinda independent. well, maybe not compared to you. you and ur bf is like machiam not gf and bf anymore! comparing me to others i tink im independent! i always go over and come back from his place alone. come back from shopping alone even with him. all i needa was to talk to him that all. is that called sticking? i dont think so bahs. obviously, the 3months OSIP is a different story! i believe my bf also wont want me to go. ur's is of course a different case. do you two still mean it when u guys tell each other that u missed or love each other? im not trying to complain or so. but yah, i just dont like the way you've put it in.

baby, i've been a good girl yesterday and today. i kept myself busy with things so that i will not think so much yeah? but, i'll be going shopping tmr with amelia and weijian! ^^

2009-01-13T21:10:00.004+08:00

baby's out to sea until either thurs night or fri morning.

i've 3 closest friends i need to thank.

Firstly, captain choo, my friend, classmates for 7years and counting.
always being there for me. my slacking partner. be it whether its gossiping or relationship problems although the comments he gives sometimes wont help but, i belive he's always there to listen to me. always tell jokes to make people smile. we hadnt been real close until we began our poly life. a few days ago, an incident happened and i kinda shouted at him and i feel i need to apologise. so weijian, im really sorry about the phone incident. i knew it wasnt your fault at all but, at that point of time, im just very pissed off. im really very sorry about that. im glad we're still close friends.

Secondly, ah hai B, my classmate for 3years and friends for 6 years and also counting.
another guy friend who will listen to my stories and complains. my another slacking partner who never fails to meet up with me and captain choo. another person who also always jokes. thank you ng boon yong!

Thirdly, ah hai I, captain Sim -.- okay. classmates for 2years and friends for 5 years and couting this girl here is also part of this clique but forever MIA-ing -.- i know she's busy with her bf, but she's still always here for me. just a call or sms away. we share everything together. yes, everything. thank you my dear!

Thank you for being a part of my life. you may ask why am i so random, yes im just so random and i found that i have to treasure everyone of you. (:

2009-01-09T09:57:00.002+08:00

okay, its been so long since i last blogged but! it doesnt matters anyway because i think no one reads it. well, i dont need anyone to read it because its all my own thoughts and feelings! (:

firstly, i failed my FTT -.-
and im retaking it on Feb 11.

secondly, im going to do my nails, learn driving and pick up my new phone later!

thridly, i've gotten my new year tops and im very satisfied with them.

fourthly, this is the 1st time,
im having nail appt with my friends!

lastly, i need my bf already. -.-

alright, so this has been my life. actually quite packed.
looking at the calendar ivy dearest gave me, my calendar's quite packed already.
15th, 20th, 22nd, 29th and 31st are the empty dates left. hahas.

bf's navy life has been good i guess?
swimming and lectures everyday. -.-
the bad part is that, he still cant book out on fridays zz.
AND! he has to book in and out in his stupid no. 4 uniform.
well, at least his no.4 isnt the new one. so well, it doesnt really affect me much!

alright till here then!

Disgrace

2009-01-04T00:17:00.001+08:00

Maybe im just a disgrace to you.
maybe im just a super heavy burden to you.
fuck everything.

2009!

2009-01-01T22:20:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year!

a whole new year, a whole new start (:

may everything be smooth between me and bee

loves.

2008-12-25T22:11:00.000+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS !!

2008-12-22T23:28:00.000+08:00

All i want for christmas is you (:

i miss you,
and i love you.
Always have and always will.
That won't change.

Navy life

2008-12-22T21:06:00.002+08:00

Darling's back to his ~~army~~ navy life. here i am stucked at home :(
christmas is 3days away! i've prepared all the presents im supposed to get.
darling seemed so busy today. but dont know busy with what. :(
anyway, i guess darling will book out on christmas eve! so its okay.
baby told me, this is a 6week training and he will have posting again. -.-
stupid right? if he's given off after the 6weeks i wouldnt mind! hahas.
alright. off to bathe and wait for baby's call! :)

2008-12-21T23:41:00.002+08:00

i've been reading young mummy's blogs. although im not a mummy nor a mummy to be yet, i feel its very interesting. im being envious of being able to get married at a young age. although i know its mostly due to shotguns but, at least they know that they have their love ones with them. well, its not that i dont have my love one with me. but you know, marriage is something memorable in a life time and babies are cute arent they? :x

time for darling to book in tomorrow morning.

Koala wallet

2008-12-19T23:01:00.001+08:00

okay. my next aim is to get this! Koala Wallet!

2008-12-19T21:21:00.007+08:00

I'm a happy girl!

Driving was alright today. but when warming up. car died a few times :( aint really satisfied!

my christmas present from bee! wahahahas.
i know its kinda early but, kan chiong! cant wait to exchange presents!

okay i forgot to remove the paper -.-

okay. im not trying to show off my bag. but this is the 1st bag that i bought with my own hard earned money!

2008-12-19T11:52:00.004+08:00

well, now we're on another part of our relationship, moving on.
baby's got into Navy.
alot of travelling to be done in Navy, alot of out-of-singapore trips to make.
isit easy to handle such relationships?
anyone's bf has or had been in navy?

its time i should be more independent
its time i should start to not stick to baby so much anymore.

i hope baby's navy life and our relationship will be smooth sailing (:

Twilight!

2008-12-16T22:48:00.001+08:00

i've finished reading Twilight and watched the movie twilight already.
The story book of course was much better as it was more detailed but, being able to see edward cullen in the movie makes the movie SUPERB! hahas. i've bought new moon. went to 2 populars and they were out of stock! and my brother bought it for me and he says its my x'mas present! hahas. :]

okay. outing with friends tmr! ^^

random!

2008-12-15T11:18:00.002+08:00

ohkay. im so bored. my stupid bf is still sleeping!

okay, xmas is coming soon. in 10 days.
baby's posting will be out in a few days time.
really hope he will be posted to somewhere relaxing.
more importantly, somewhere with a higher pay! :x
im still thinking of a plan how to get the burberry bag into my house! >.< LOL.
i think my parents will start nagging at how i anyhow spend money.

meeting baby tomorrow,
out with ivy,ahchoo & nby on wed.
meeting darling on thurs
Driving and meeting baby on fri.
working on saturday.
sunday no plans yet!

:]

Buberry!

2008-12-14T21:58:00.000+08:00

YES! finally. i bought my burberry bag! but, its still at darling's place . ROARS.
i can only collect it on x'mas!

2008-12-13T00:03:00.001+08:00

im SICK again. :(

2008-12-12T11:34:00.000+08:00

Enough of studying.
im prepared to fail marketing.
memorising sucks. i've given up!

2nd driving lesson later! wahahahs.

Overseas Study

2008-12-11T20:04:00.002+08:00

mummy says she will send me overseas to study if i dont do well.
can i not go? sigh.

overseas relationship isnt easy to maintain.
i know you people must be thinking, everything i do always think of my bf. you must be wondering how much he meant to me.

EVERYTHING.
Sim Yong Jun means EVERYTHING TO ME.

i dun wanna go overseas. hais.

2008-12-10T22:39:00.002+08:00

life's been good for me except those quaralls and little misunderstandings.
i've read one of my friends blog and i realised whatever she wrote is true and right.
only bfs are the one and only there for us, if my bf leaves me i believe i will fall like she did.
well, i've lost a good and true friend but i believe things are slowly getting back between me and her. i dont know if u read my blog so yah.

there are many things running through my mind.
im so afraid darling and i will end up walking different ways.
i know we are living in different worlds? i believe although i know you have changed and wont lead ur night life anymore, willing to quit smoking just for me. thank you baby.
is maintaining a relationship that easy?
is our relationship still a growing one or we have already matured it?
im so afraid that we are still in the honeymoon period, when we get out of it, how will life be for me and you?
we've been through most ups and downs. army is one good example.
2weeks confinement to the 3months BMT. glad we've been through it.
well, everything's fate.
can people control fate or is fate meant to be already controlled by god?
if we can control it, i really hope, i can live as long as i can with baby.
last as long as i can with baby.

baby, i really love you.

Twilight

2008-12-09T16:49:00.003+08:00

i wouldnt mind having a vampire bf whom is as charming as edward cullen! :x
sorry bee :x

CRAP. i cannot wait to watch the movie! im so tempted to watch it online but NO! i will die die wait for December 18. Hahas. i'll make sure darling will go with me! and most importantly, EDWARD CULLEN IS SO HANDSOME CAN! :x he's on my lappy's wallpaper, simple to say, replacing baby. :x really. i cant wait to finish reading twilight and buy the whole series! and im so gonna complete them! wahahahas.

2008-12-08T21:13:00.002+08:00

i might be flying off to hongkong during xmas :[ which means, i cant celebrate xmas with baby.
shall see how things go.

tomorrow's baby's POP. :]
long off for him! ^^

2008-12-06T23:39:00.003+08:00

have you ever thought of watching the sun rise and sun set with me?
have you ever thought of buying me roses?
have you ever thought of giving me surprises?
have you ever thought of getting me a necklace?
have you ever thought how important i am to you?
have you ever thought that you can speak to my mum and assure u will take good care of me?
have you ever thought how i felt when you're out with ur friends?
have you ever thought how it feels like being alone?
have you ever thought how i feel whenever you comment on small things which i love to do?
have you ever thought of picking me up at my doorstep even before i tell you im leaving house to ur place?
have you ever thought of really giving me happiness for now and for the future?
have you ever thought of starting to save now for our future?
have you ever thought of how much i needed you?
have you ever thought how nice am i to you?
have you ever thought of treasuring me?
have you ever thought of giving me the best?
have you ever thought of appreciating me for all the things i've done?
have you ever thought how i bear with you when u do stupid things?
have you ever thought i might have enough of you?
have you ever thought that im not that strong at all?
have you ever thought that whatever i say and whatever my heart feels is always different?
have you ever thought what if i could go out till late and ton outside?
have you ever really gave me everything that i wanted?

have you ever thought that i would leave you someday?

im not that important i guess.

2008-12-06T22:44:00.002+08:00

1.The person who tag/pass you:
Erica Loh

2.Your relationship with him/her:
Dearest cousin

3.Your three impression of him/her:
Pretty, easy to clique with, fun and loving :]

4.The most memorable thing he/she had done for you:
cant rmb? O.O cousins for 17 years leh.

5.The most memorable thing he/she had said to you:
something like, she'll always be there? O.O cant rmb uhs.

6.If he/she becomes your lover, you will:
never tot of it -.-

7.If he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be:
O.O

8.If he/she become your enemy, you will:
impossible. my cousin leh!

9.If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be:
the thing is, its impossible so how can there be a reason?

10.The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is:
find her a bf :x so that i can have a brother in law! hahas.

11.Your overall impression of him/her is:
Miss Vain port.

12.How you think people around you will feel about you?:
fat? short?

13.The characters you love of yourself are:
nothing? lols

14.On the contrary, the characters you hate yourself are:
hot tempered, no patience

15.The most ideal person you want to be is:
O.O

16.For people that care and like you, say something to them:
thanks for the care and concerns? LOL

2008-12-06T22:40:00.003+08:00

how long more can this last?
why?
best bf?

hahas.

its not easy being me you know?
despite all the waiting. i've get nothing in return.

fucking father

2008-12-04T22:17:00.002+08:00

Yes, i've got a fucking attituded father. im very pissed by his actions.

firstly, i know its my fault for coming home so late, u gave me a call and i talked to u nicely and you fucking hang my phone and that's what it makes me so angry.

secondly, im big enough, and i believe im very guai. coming home by 10pm at the age of 18 is very rarely seen wtf more do you want? you have no fucking say in my life. have you ever given me a fucking cent? its all from mummy's pocket.

thirdly, stop trying to be sacarstic la fucker. if u ever dare fucking whack me, im going to leave the house. so stop trying to be unreasonable to me.

okay. i've rant out everything i wanted and these are the words i told him without the fucks. :] how i wish mummy will divorce you, this useless fucking person.

fuck off from my world JASON TAN CHENG SOON.

alright. enough. darling hasnt called. i bet he's surely enjoying his recruit night in home clothes! hahas. 2days to darling's book out! yayness.

3days

2008-12-03T22:01:00.002+08:00

its been a long time since i blogged.

3 more days to darling's book out.
i AM very no life. everyday except weekends are always countdowns. however, thats not going to happen for next week! because its darling's POP! :]

im over and done with my BTT, FTT's in January, Practical driving lessons this friday! yes, im super duper wuber excited -.- but! im afraid my car will die every now and then -.-. yeah, my instructor's my cousin's instructor who thought my cousin and my cousin passed okay! 1 attempt for TP, FTT and BTT. pressurized -.- i cant wait to have my license and i'll probably save $40 a week from cabbing to and from baby's place. HAHA.

Tomorrow's the day!

2008-11-28T10:05:00.003+08:00

YES. tomorrow, finally in less than 24hours time i guess i can meet baby already! book out book out!

okay, i've got BTT e-trial later and meeting erica cousin to pierce her naval! ^^
will blog again tonight!

C902

2008-11-26T19:13:00.003+08:00

YAY C902. finally mine! yay.

okay. there's this bloody shop at bedok interchange that sells china phones, please beware. the name of the shop is MobileOne. zzz.

darling boy is booking out in 3days time! YES

what if....

2008-11-25T17:20:00.002+08:00

what if you werent here with me?
what if you were gone?
what if you tell me you dont love me anymore?
what if you told me you've found someone better?
what if you told me we're not going to walk down the aisle together?
what if you told me im not the perfect one for you?
what if you told me you're going to leave right now?

so many what ifs.
baby, you're so important to me.

everyone's a fake.
except baby.

dont worry darling, im here for you and i know you're here for me too!

BTT in 1 week's time!

book in :[

2008-11-23T22:03:00.006+08:00

okay. baby booked in again! ROARS.

Thursday.
kbox with cousin, swensen's with jorden, sat on jorden's car. was a little afraid at first. me and erica was like, EH u sit infront leh! hahas. uhhh. baby booked out at 9.30.

im talking to erica's mum -.-

okay thats my slipper on the far left -.-

Friday.
went to baby house early in the morning due to the urge of having to hugggg him -.- went to ps, vivo city.

Saturday.
steamboat with eric and JS and BEEEE. slack at baby's place, went to town.

Sunday.
a day which i dread most! darling's book in.

okay off.

2008-11-21T22:00:00.001+08:00

baby, u're all that i need.

Erica Loh

2008-11-20T23:40:00.001+08:00

i need to thank someone so much. she accompanied me the whole of today and listens to my complains. ERICA LOH! thank you so much dearest cousin! :] LOVES

YES. BOOK OUT

2008-11-20T23:10:00.003+08:00

finally, my bf's out from camp. and free from the ~~bloody~~ muddy field camp. my heart aches when i first saw him, he become skinnier and suddenly SUPER small in size. sigh. i will feed him with good food this 3 days. yes. like finally, i miss him so much.

book out?

2008-11-20T07:41:00.001+08:00

beeeeee, faster call me :[
i hope i can see you later :[

:[

2008-11-19T21:41:00.001+08:00

will darling book out tomorrow?
i ~~fucking~~ miss you darn loads .

2days

2008-11-18T20:29:00.002+08:00

okay. today's day 4 of darling's field camp. have u seen mehmeh's friend? ROARS. everyday i wonder about this -.-

okay this is the first time i skipped lesson to accompany my dearest cousin to re-dye her hair. NICE okay! :] meeting her again on thurday. actually, i cant wait for thursday because of 2 reasons, firstly, of course my darling's booking out. secondly, i get to slack with my closest cousin again! hahas.

okay 2 days to go. BABYYYY~

3days

2008-11-17T22:10:00.002+08:00

3 more days to baby's book out. hurry hurry. let time FLY please~

baby baby, have you seen meh meh friends? :x

loves and misses.

Field Camp Day 2

2008-11-16T23:02:00.000+08:00

okay. i need my bee already. :[

Day 1 of field camp

2008-11-15T16:36:00.003+08:00

alright. today's the 1st day of baby's field camp which means not being able to contact him for the next following days. im still feeling alright now. people, dont worry too much about me. :] because im mostly occupied with things to do. yes, its for sure i'll miss him. but, if i miss him too much till i cry, i know darling will be darn worried about me. so YES. strong gf i am :] darling said, he would be going into the forest to look for mehmeh's friends -.- hopefully he will bump into them uh! incase you guys dont know who is mehmeh, its me and darling's imaginative baby which is a sheep softtoy -.- i know we are lame.

one of my closest cousin, jolene has left for china and wouldnt be back till 2 years later. maybe they will only be back for some short holiday. :] my eyes were filled with tears when she hugged me goodbye but, i hold back my tears. :[

here's my schedule for the week to keep myself occupied from thinking of darling.

Saturday - work
Sunday - work , piano
Monday - school , watch tv
Tuesday - school, watch tv
Wednesday - school, watch tv
Thursday - school, meet erica, BABY'S BOOK OUT

super no life right? ROARS. faster thursday pleaseeee~

2008-11-14T18:52:00.003+08:00

alright. i think i've become an anna sui's perfume fan -.- i currently have 3 of her perfumes, dolly girl, dolly girl 'on the beach' and dolly girl 'lil scarlet'. there goes my $180. T.Tbut i really love the nice scent of the perfumes la. so no regrets!

and i've decided to get C902 cause W902 is tooooo ugly! :] and i dont think i need a walkman function or a bigger screen which costs an extra $100 -.-

just came back from slacking with artz choo and nby. congrats to nby for passing his BTT and good luck to artz choo who's gonna take his BTT on monday. and mine -.- coming up on december 2. so SLLOOWWW. ROARS.

alright, tmr's darling's field camp already. T.T 6days no contact! this is a big challenge! and im all prepared what to wear for darling's book out on thurs,fri,sat and sun! :] something friends wouldnt get to see me wearing except for classmates who sees me on thursday! alright. off to watch 7pm showww~

1 week

2008-11-13T16:47:00.003+08:00

1 week to book out !

shopping, pizza, tontom, movies, photo taking............. :] i cannot wait!

Even a thousand miles cant keep us apart, cause my heart is wherever you are. :]

8 days ; 3days

2008-11-12T20:39:00.002+08:00

8days to baby's book and 3days to baby's field camp!

RAAAHHHSSS.
im missing baby so much that my whole blog is bloody filled with me and baby's photo -.- sorry reader, im missing my darling so fucking much okay. :[ i cant wait to go shopping with baby on his book out and maybe pull him to take neo prints! WAHAHAS. i want my beeee la. :[ field camp sucks big time GRRR.

im considering whether to get sony ericsson's C902 or W902 ? O.O

field camp! :[

2008-11-09T21:24:00.003+08:00

alright, darling has just booked in :[ and im all alone again.
another 11days before we can meet again. shagged. however this time, out of the 11 days, 6days field camp! field camp is fine but! cannot use phone! thats the worst part, means we're not being able to talk to each other!

awaiting next book out which is next next thurs? shagged.

11days.

i finally bought my anna sui's dolly girl 'on the beach' perfume!
like, went to so many shops and asked none of them carries it anymore. thanks to darling for buying it for me!

darling's got a braun buffel belt too! his xmas present from me~ so i dont have to headache to what to get for him! :]